we probably all know people who are referred to in the following ways: “she’s a great negotiator; really tough, drives a hard bargain. everyone is intimidated by her” (think margaret thatcher, bob crow or michael o’leary) or “he’s a great negotiator; always looking for the win/win, really creative in his approach. everyone trusts him” (think gorbachev or branson).

some people subscribe to the view that it is not possible to reach the optimum outcome in a negotiation without at least the threat of deadlock. if the other party knows that you are amenable towards reaching an agreement then they will expect you to be flexible and for all of the value transfer to come from your side of the table. conversely therefore,

It’s not what most people want to hear, but it’s true.

It’s amazing how often i’ve heard statements like ‘customer x is always like that – whenever we talk to them about a price increase they just reject it. They always beat us down from our opening position’.

Doing the job that I do engenders some interesting responses from people in social settings. some people love the idea of it and want to find out more about the psychology involved. Some people think it is machiavellian and has its roots in manipulating people, but whatever their thoughts on it, they always have an opinion, and it usually leads to some great conversation.